Ramadan is a time of increased worship in our lives. In addition to the fasting, there is often an increase in other areas of worship, for instance the reading of Qur’an, and giving in charity. Keep these things up, even if it is only a small amount. The Prophet said, “The deeds most loved by God are those done regularly, even if they are small.” (Bukhari and Muslim).1. Read a little of the Qur’an every day - you would just need to read 18 verses of the Qur’an per day to finish the whole Qur’an within the year. 2. Upload the Qur’an onto your iPod or MP3 player with a recitation by a Qari whom you find inspirational and listen to some everyday. The iQuran Pro for iPods has various Qaris, translations, as well as the ability to read in Arabic script. 3. In addition to your annual zakat and the zakat al-fitr given on Eid, perhaps sponsor a child, give a micro-finance loan to someone through an ongoing charity scheme, or find a project such as a school in a developing country where you can have a regular engagement. Such charity gives you an emotional connection to the recipient and will help you in being contented with the blessings that God has provided you. 4. Remember, fasting is not just for Ramadan; the Prophet said, “He who fasts Ramadan, and six days of Shawaal, it is as if they fasted a whole year.” (Muslim, Tirmidi, Abu Dawood, Ahmad, Ibn Maajah) Fasting is also recommended on the day of ‘Arafah (the 9th day of Dhul-Hijjah) and the 10th of Muharram. The Prophet said, “Fasting on the day of ‘Arafah expiates two years of sins, last year’s and next year’s, and fasting on the tenth of Muharram expiates the previous year’s (of sins).” (Muslim) Mondays and Thursdays are also recommended days to fast, for the Prophet said, “The deeds of the worshippers are presented before God on Monday and Thursday, I like my deeds to be presented while I am fasting.” (Nasa’I)
“Actions are judged by intentions” (Bukhari and Muslim) said the Prophet, and Ramadan helps to bring this saying fully into focus by requiring us to make the intention to fast.
5. Make an intention to act before every action. This will mean that there will be a conscious decision; and the making of conscious decisions means the brain is switched on. Conscious decision making allows us to override our routines and patterns of behaviour we have grown accustomed to, particularly our bad habits. By making sure our mind is present in our decision making process and before every action more effective control will be taken of our own lives. 6. Ramadan has the potential to reset your spiritual compass and give your life renewed direction. Create a list of the ways you wish to improve your life spiritually and in other ways. Intentions function somewhat like targets and goals in today’s modern management speak. Various studies have shown the link between having a goal, writing that goal down, telling others of the goal and success in actual attainment of the goal. Setting purpose to un-defined aspiration, having a plan with tangible targets, gives practical force to a mere hope. Remember to include ‘Insha’Allah’, God-willing, for what you intend.
Ramadan is a time of increased connections – an increased connection to God through remembrance of Him and the search to please Him, an increased connection to the Ummah through the collective act of fasting, an increased connection to the family and close friends through the shared intimacy of fasting and breaking the fast together, and an increased connection to one’s inner self by the act of fasting; stripping away externalities. Maintaining these connections after Ramadan ends requires effort. Connecting to God 7. Incorporate ‘alhamdulillah’ into your life. Thanking and praising Him for the small bounties in your life, even in adversity, leads to gratitude and contentment. The Prophet said “Alhamdulillah is the statement of appreciation. When the servant says alhamdulillah, God says, ‘My servant has praised Me.’’’ (Ibn Abi Hatim) 8. Ask for help from Him even with the smallest with difficulties. The Prophet Musa was told to pray even for the salt on his food. 9. Reflect on God by learning His names with their meaning. 10. Make a regular time to contemplate the natural world, for it is revelation from God, “And among His Signs is the creation of the heavens and the earth.” (Qur’an 30:22) Connecting to the Ummah 11. Connect to the wider Muslim community by travelling to a Muslim country you’ve never been to before, or if that is beyond your financial means, reach out to a different community of Muslims within your own country 12. Choose a country a month and explore its traditions and history of its people through books and online. 13. Choose a charity project abroad to support Connecting to your family and close friends 14. Iftar is a time to eat with your family – continue to have a regular, collective family meal together. 15. Following the adage, “The family that prays together, stays together” make prayer in ja’ma regularly, spending time afterwards to reflect and talk to one another, sharing stories from Islamic history or the companions perhaps. 16. Invite others to dine with you, and accept the invitations of others for that is one of the five rights a Muslim has over another Muslim; the other four being, to return the greetings of salam, to visit the sick, to accompany funeral processions, and to respond to the one that sneezes. (Bukhari & Muslim) 17. Be the one to forgive and move on, and remember the “Three Day Rule”, for the Prophet said, “It is not allowed for a Muslim to desert his brother for over three days.” (Muslim & Tirmidhi) 18. Tell the ones you love that you love them. The Prophet said, “If one of you loves his brother for God’s sake, then let him know, since it causes familiarity to endure and firmly establishes love.” (Bukhari) 19. Put those you love first and empathise with their emotions, as the Prophet said, “Love for your brother what you love for yourself.” (Muslim) Connecting to yourself 20. Try to find a quiet time every day to reflect on yourself that day. What did you learn from that day? What could you have done better? What were the strengths of that day? What were the weaknesses? Remember if you have had a bad day – every new dawn, brings with it new opportunities. 21. List the things that you like about yourself. We may think that would be immodest and vain, but it is worth remembering that you are a creation of the Most High, and of the best of creations. The Prophet said, “God is merciful towards the one who knows his worth” – so start listing your worth. 22. List the things that you think need changing about yourself. Think of this positively. The Prophet said that “A Muslim is a mirror to another Muslim” (Abu Dawud), but we need to be a mirror unto our own selves first. 23. Create a space which you always keep tidy, scented and beautiful. The Prophet said, “God is beautiful and He likes beauty” (Muslim), so such a space will give you a place to re-charge your batteries, and to reflect upon your inner self.
Ramadan brought discipline into your life. You did not eat or drink whenever and whatever you wanted. There was a time for these things. You had to control your instinct. Ramadan is a powerful symbol that you can control yourself, that you can set yourself a target and stick to it. Taking that discipline and control forward is potentially one of the greatest blessings of the month.
24. Do not over eat. Just because we can eat once Ramadan is over doesn’t mean we have to gorge ourselves. Obesity has been classed as the disease of the 21st century. Consider this saying of the Prophet, where the ‘one third rule’ is a concession to our desires, “No human ever filled a vessel worse than the stomach. Sufficient for any son of Adam are some morsels to keep his back straight. But if it must be, then one third for his food, one third for his drink and one third for his breath.” (Tirmidhi & others) 25.Time keep was essential during Ramadan. You watched the clock to begin and end your fasts. Do not let that slack now. The jokes about “Muslim/Arab/Pakistani/Bengali etc Mean Time having extra minutes in every hour” say something. Punctuality is important in your lives – for prayers, for appointments, for work and school. When the Prophet was asked, “Which deed is the dearest to God?” He replied, “To offer the prayers at their early stated fixed times.” (Bukhari) To fulfill obligations and appointments early rather than late will endear you to people in this world too. 26. Watch your anger. The Prophet advised, “Do not become angry”, and those who control their anger are described by the Qur’an thus, “Those who spend (in God’s cause) in prosperity and in adversity, who repress their anger, and who pardon men, verily, God loves those that do good.” (3:133-134). In Ramadan one has greater self awareness so this is perhaps easier. Outside of Ramadan follow the Prophetic three point anger management plan of making wudu, sitting or lying down. The Prophet also recommended saying, “I seek Refuge with God from Satan” when feeling angry (Bukhari) and making the dua, “I ask you O God, for truthful speech during times of pleasure and anger” (Ahmad) 27. Sleep less. Sleep is a blessing from God and you should have sufficient hours, but do not sleep more than necessary. The Qur’an describes God’s righteous servants as “They used to sleep but little of the night” (51:17) and those “Who forsake their beds to cry unto their Lord in fear and hope” (32:16)
Ramadan has taught that to achieve the target of completing the fasts one has to be steadfast in adversity. The month is a living testament to the many exhortations in the Qur’an and the sayings of the Prophet to have sabr – patient perseverance, and there is reward in this, “Give glad tidings to those who exercise patience when struck with adversity and say, ‘Indeed, we belong to God and to Him is our return.’ Such ones receive [the] blessings and mercy of their Lord, and such are the guided ones.” (Qur’an 2:155) 28. Patience is often lost when we try to do too many things at once. Slow down, focus and prioritise. 29. Try and establish what makes you lose patience. Are there any patterns to your loss of patience? Can you eliminate those things? 30. Inculcate hope and a positive mental attitude. The Qur’an reminds us that an attribute of Iblis is that he lost hope. Do this by focusing on small blessings in your life, and write them down. 31. God’s delays are not necessarily His denials. Maybe you have to learn something before the adversity will be removed. List what lessons you are learning from the current adversity and how it is benefiting your character.
Our response to a difficulty or a problem can be to seek a distraction. Even with Ramadan, we may seek activity, even sleep, so that we do not have to feel the hunger or the thirst. However, one can only really gain the full significance of the month by developing focus on the hunger and thirst and examining what it is trying to teach us. Without doing so we may only get, as the hadith says, “...nothing except hunger and thirst, and many people who pray at night get nothing from it except wakefulness.” (Darimi) We should develop focus in every aspect of our lives in order to extract the fullest benefits. 32. Do a little bit more than you feel like doing or think you can do. 33. Remove distractions as much as possible. Identify what is a negative drain on your focus and remove it. The removal may not need to be permanent; just until it does not distract you as much. 34. Keep the objectives of your action in mind. If you are reading Qur’an set your objective for that Qur’an reading session first. 35. Enlist the support of others to help you stay focused, bearing in mind the Prophetic saying on choosing friends, “A good friend and a bad friend are like a perfume-seller and a blacksmith: The perfume-seller might give you some perfume as a gift, or you might buy some from him, or at least you might smell its fragrance. As for the blacksmith, he might singe your clothes, and at the very least you will breathe in the fumes of the furnace. (Bukhari and Muslim) 36. The breaking of the fast is a reward for the fasting person in this world, with other reward in the Hereafter. Grant yourself positive rewards when you have maintained your focus and achieved your set goal.
The body is an amanah, a trust, from God. We cannot abuse it. Fasting is actually beneficial to a healthy person. Detoxification occurs as the liver, kidney, lungs, lymph glands and skin eliminate or neutralise toxins. Fasting speeds up this process as the body breaks down fats, however health needs to be maintained all year round. 37. Think about the foods you eat. Fasting breaks down toxins, but it is better not to put in the toxins in the first place. Minimise fatty, fried, and sugary foods. 38. Do some exercise. It does not have to be difficult and you do not have to buy expensive equipment or a gym membership. A pair of walking shoes and a pedometer will make sure you do 10,000 steps a day Р3,000 of which should be aerobic. The Qur'an reminds us "Rivalry for worldly gain will distract you until you visit your grave." (102:1-2) And the Prophet said, "If the son of Adam were given a valley full of gold, he would love to have a second one; and if he were given the second one, he would love to have a third, for nothing fills the belly of Adam’s son except dust. And God forgives he who repents to Him." (Bukhari) Finding pleasure in people, events, nature and not in things, is a way to deal with this weakness of human beings, and to find true contentment. 39. The mind is wired to work better when things are framed in the positive, so whilst it is about wanting less and giving up things, frame it mentally that it is about gaining MORE contentment. 40. Create a list of small, free things that give you peace and happiness, e.g. a walk
Ultimately, there is no end to such a list, but making the spirit of Ramadan last the whole year is about YOU and your commitment to WANTING that spirit to last the whole year. It will take effort, courage, discipline, and fortitude – but as these are the characteristics which Ramadan taught you, you can do it!
Abu Sa`id Al-Khudri (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Prophet of Allah (sallallahu alayhi wassallam) said: "There was a man from among a nation before you who killed ninety-nine people and then made an inquiry about the most learned person on the earth. He was directed to a monk. He came to him and told him that he had killed ninety-nine people and asked him if there was any chance for his repentance to be accepted. He replied in the negative and the man killed him also completing one hundred. He then asked about the most learned man in the earth. He was directed to a scholar. He told him that he had killed one hundred people and asked him if there was any chance for his repentance to be accepted. He replied in the affirmative and asked, `Who stands between you and repentance? Go to such and such land; there (you will find) people devoted to prayer and worship of Allah, join them in worship, and do not come back to your land because it is an evil place.' So he went away and hardly had he covered half the distance when death overtook him; and there was a dispute between the angels of mercy and the angels of torment. The angels of mercy pleaded, 'This man has come with a repenting heart to Allah,' and the angels of punishment argued, 'He never did a virtuous deed in his life.' Then there appeared another angel in the form of a human being and the contending angels agreed to make him arbiter between them. He said, `Measure the distance between the two lands. He will be considered belonging to the land to which he is nearer.' They measured and found him closer to the land (land of piety) where he intended to go, and so the angels of mercy collected his soul".
[Al-Bukhari and Muslim]
In another version: "He was found to be nearer to the locality of the pious by a cubit and was thus included among them". Another version says: "Allah commanded (the land which he wanted to leave) to move away and commanded the other land (his destination) to draw nearer and then He said: 'Now measure the distance between them.' It was found that he was nearer to his goal by a hand's span and was thus forgiven". It is also narrated that he drew closer by a slight movement on his chest.
Commentary:
1. One comes to know from this Hadith that the gate of Taubah is open even for the worst of the sinners; and Allah forgives everyone provided he repents sincerely, the conditions for such repentance have already been discussed.
2. It is the duty of a religious scholar that while discussing a problem, he should keep in mind the psychological aspects of the questioner and adopt a policy which neither causes a change in the Injunction of Allah nor make the sinner reckless in his sins out of frustration.
3. When a situation warrants, angels appear in the form of men on Orders of Allah.
Ramadan is the most auspicious and blessed month of the entire Islamic calendar. Among all Muslims, the month of Ramadan is celebrated with great enthusiasm and devotion and Muslims start preparing for the Ramadan spirit soon after Shab-e-Barat. During this month, Muslims pray a lot and fast regularly for an entire month till the celebration of Eid.
Essential Facts about the Month of Ramadan
Ramadan is a very blessed month and during this month, Allah promises to listen to all legitimate prayers of Muslims. Fasting during this month is a way to protect you from evil and learn patience, humility and control. It is also considered to be a shield against evil and allows Muslims to get rid of their sins. The Prophet (PBUH) said,
“Whoever fasts during the month of Ramadan out of sincere faith and hoping for a reward from Allah will have all of his previous sins forgiven.”
One important benefit of fasting is that it helps you to understand the suffering and pain of the poor. It also allows human beings to understand how those who do not have enough money for a meal survive through the day. Therefore, it is believed that fasting makes individuals a better human being as it allows them to associate with the pain of others.
Fasting also allows individuals to learn self-restraint, self-control and sacrifice for the love of a higher deity. It eventually teaches Muslims to connect with their inner self through rigorous praying and worshipping.
Do’s and Don’ts of Ramadan
While fasting during Ramadan, all Muslims should try to follow the things given below.
5. Helping poor in monetary terms to break their fast
6. Being patient and observe self-control
While fasting during Ramadan, Muslims should abstain from the following activities:
1. Eating food and drinking water or any other kind of fluid
2. Getting angry or losing temper
3. Being impolite, rude or inconsiderate
4. Using obscene language or bad words
5. Gossiping and backbiting
6. Lying or cheating
7. Arguing, fighting or yelling
8. Indulging in sexual activities
When Ramadan Fasts can be skipped
Islam is not a strict religion as it understands the problems that humans may face. Therefore, Allah allows individuals to skip their Ramadan fasts if they fulfill some conditions. Individuals who can skip the fast include the following:
1. Those who have to travel beyond the city and they do not have the strength to travel without food and water for the entire day.
2. Those who are sick, suffering from a very painful disease or those who need to take medicines regularly.
3. Elderly individuals who are too weak to stay hungry and thirsty for the entire day.
4. Women who are going through their menstruation cycle or those who are going through their postnatal bleeding stage.
5. Women who are expecting as they might need to take medicines regularly otherwise it may affect their or the baby’s health.
6. Those who are mentally ill.
Women who are going through their menstruation cycle, postnatal bleeding or individuals who are sick may also complete their fast after the month of Ramadan is completed.
Ramadan Guidelines to Stay Healthy
During this month, people face a lot of health related problems because of the sudden change in their routine. Individuals suffer from problems such as headache, low blood pressure, constipation, gastritis etc. therefore, it is always wise to keep a strict check on your diet during this month. Some guidelines are mentioned below.
1. Consume slow digesting foods such as oat, wheat, barley, lentil etc.
2. Eat fibrous food such as green vegetables, beetroot, fruit with skin etc.
3. Avoid fried and high cholesterol food such as sweets, potatoes, junk food etc.
4. Avoid overeating. At iftar, eat like you eat during the normal days for one meal.
5. Consume almonds, bananas, dates, haleem etc.
6. Increase water intake to stay hydrated during the day.
7. Avoid tea and coffee.
Conclusion
Ramadan is a blessed month for all Muslims. During this month, Muslims should focus on praying, worshipping, abstaining from forbidden things rather than on eating good food and buying expensive clothes for Eid. Live Quran based life and encourage others to do the same.
(O ye who believe! Fasting is prescribed to you as it was prescribed to those before you, that ye may (learn) self-restraint.) (Al-Baqarah 2:183) (O ye who believe! fear Allah as He should be feared, and die not except in a state of Islam.) (Aal `Imran 3:102) “Every deed of the child of Adam is for him except fasting; it is for Me and I shall reward it. The (bad) breath of the mouth of a fasting person is more pleasing to Allah than the perfume of musk.”(Al-Bukhari)
The purpose of fasting is not to make us hungry and thirsty, or to deprive us some of our comfort and conveniences. The real purpose of fasting is that we learn taqwa. Taqwa is highly emphasized in the Qur’an and Sunnah. There are more than 158 verses in the Qur’an on taqwa, and there are hundreds of hadiths on this subject. Taqwa is Islam itself. It is the sum total of all Islamic values and virtues. If one has taqwa one has achieved everything. Taqwa is the consciousness of Allah. It is to do one’s best efforts to live by His commands and to avoid His prohibitions. The Qur’an has used the word taqwa to mean consciousness of Allah, fear of Allah, worship of Allah, sincerity in faith, and avoidance of disobedience to Allah. Fasting builds the character of taqwa if it is done in the right way. How does fasting build the character of taqwa? Let us look at some of the things that a fasting person is supposed to do, and see how they are related to the concept and spirit of taqwa. 1. Unlike prayers, charity, and pilgrimage, fasting is an invisible act. Only Allah and the person who is fasting know whether he or she is fasting or not. One may quietly eat or drink something and no one will notice and no one can find out. However, the fasting person has made this commitment for the sake of Allah and he or she wants to guard the purity of his or her fast for the sake of Allah. Fasting thus teaches sincerity, and it helps a person learn to live by the principles of his or her faith regardless whether others know or do not know. This is the very purpose and essence of taqwa. 2. Food and sex are two needs and desires that are essential for human survival and growth, but they can become easily corruptive and disruptive if they are not properly controlled and disciplined. Taqwa requires observing the rules of Allah when one eats and when one enjoys sexual relations. Fasting teaches how to control and discipline these desires. 3. The world is full of temptations. It takes a lot of discipline to say “no” to something that is very tempting but not good for us. During fasting we learn how to say “no” to things that are otherwise permissible and good, but are forbidden during fasting. When one learns how to say “no” to that which is generally permissible, then one can easily control oneself to avoid that which is forbidden. This is the spirit of taqwa. 4. People generally care for themselves and their families, but they often ignore the needs of others. Those who have do not even feel the pain and suffering of those who are hungry, homeless, and living in poverty. Through fasting we taste—to some extent—the pain and suffering of those who are poor and destitute. Fasting teaches empathy and sympathy, and it takes away some of our selfishness and self-centeredness. This is the spirit of taqwa. 5. When Muslims fast together in the month of Ramadan, it builds an atmosphere of virtues, brotherhood and sisterhood. We come closer to our Creator and we also come closer to each other. Unity, peace, harmony, brotherhood and sisterhood are the fruits of taqwa. In Ramadan we enjoy these fruits as we grow in taqwa. There are some important things that we should do during Ramadan to take better advantage of this month and to achieve its real purpose, namely, taqwa. These are some reminders and they are all taken from the guidelines given to us in the Qur’an and Sunnah. 1. Niyyah (intention): Remind yourself again and again that you are fasting in obedience to Allah. Be sincere in your intention. You want Allah to accept your fasting. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:
"Whosoever fasts in Ramadan with faith and seeking Allah’s reward, all his past sins will be forgiven."(Al-Bukhari)
2. Sunnah: Observe the Sunnah in fasting. Take the sahur meal a little before dawn and end your fast at sunset. Observe all the rules of fasting. 3. Wara’ (avoiding everything haram or makruh): Be conscious to have halal food, halal income, halal relations. Avoid watching bad TV programs, videos, movies, etc., always, but especially during this month. Keep your body and mind very clean. Avoid wasting your time in useless things and pursuits. 4. Qur’an: Spend more time with the Qur’an. Read Qur’an every day. Try to finish the whole Qur’an at least one time during this month in your own personal reading. Read some Hadith and the books of seerah. 5. Prayer, supplication, and remembrance of Allah: Pray on time and observe all Prayers. Do not ignore the Tarawih Prayers. Make more supererogatory prayers. Do as much worship as you can. Do more dhikr (remembrance of Allah) and du`aa’ (supplication) for yourself and for others. Make tawbah (repentance) and istighfar (request for Allah’s forgiveness) as much as you can. This is the best time for devotion and seeking Allah’s forgiveness. Seek the Night of Qadar by special devotion during the last 10 nights of this month. 6. Zakah, charity, and generosity: Be very charitable and generous. Give more and more to help the poor and needy, and to help good social and community projects. Be good to your friends and neighbors also. Let your non-Muslim neighbors and co-workers know that this is your blessed and sacred time. 7. Good behavior and relations with others. Try to be extra kind and courteous during this month. Forget your quarrels and disputes. Reconcile and forgive. Do not get involved in backbiting, lying, cheating, and anything that is wrong. Be very good to Muslims and to all human beings. 8. Reflection: Think, reflect, and plan to improve the moral and spiritual condition of your own self and your family. Think about any wrong things and sins you may have been doing and correct yourself. Think about any deficiencies you have in your Islamic observances and plan to change yourself. Think what you can do for the Ummah and for humanity to make this world a better place for everyone. It is reported in the Bible that the Children of Israel used to fast, but they complained to their prophet that they were not receiving God’s blessings. God was not answering their prayers. It is reported that God revealed to His prophet:
“Why have we fasted, and thou seest it not? Why have we humbled ourselves, and thou takest no knowledge of it?” Behold, in the day of your fast you seek your own pleasure, and oppress all your workers. Behold, you fast only to quarrel and to fight and to hit with wicked fist. Fasting like yours this day will not make your voice to be heard on high. Is not this the fast that I choose: to loose the bonds of wickedness, to undo the thongs of the yoke, to let the oppressed go free, and to break every yoke? Is it not to share your bread with the hungry, and bring the homeless poor into your house; when you see the naked, to cover him, and not to hide yourself from your own flesh? Then shall your light break forth like the dawn, and your healing shall spring up speedily; your righteousness shall go before you, the glory of the LORD shall be your rear guard. Then you shall call, and the LORD will answer; you shall cry, and he will say, Here I am. (Isaiah 58:3-9)
May Allah help us to take full benefit of fasting in this blessed month of Ramadan. May He keep us on the right path and bless us now and always. Ameen! By: Muzammil H. Siddiqi
In the name of ALLAH, the Most Compassionate, the Most Merciful.
La ilaha il-Allah, Muhammad-ur-RasulullahEnglish translation of this Arabic phrase is:There is no God except Allah; Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah.
Recitation with understanding of true meaning of this phrase is all that is required for converting to Islam. This phrase, known as Shahada, is a simple creed but has very profound meaning in it and the faith behind it brings people out from darkness into light. By making this declaration and by accepting the obligations of Islamic Law, anyone can join this fastest growing religion. Any person who sincerely believes that there is only One True God, worthy of worship - Allah - the Creator, the Sustainer, the Lord of the Heaven and the Earth and all that exists; and accepts that Muhammad (peace be upon him) was the last and final Messenger of Allah, is a Muslim. Allah is the proper name of God. Islam is acceptance of Allah's commands and guidance as our Creator. Obedience to Allah brings peace. As the word Islam means peace, it is effectively the religion of every human who likes peace. A person who accepts Allah's guidance and acts upon His commands is a Muslim. Muslims believe in all Prophets and Messengers of God on earth, including Adam, Noah, Abraham, Ishmael, Isaac, Jacob, Moses, David, Jesus (peace be upon them) and the last Messenger of God, Muhammad (peace be upon him). Islam is based on belief in all original Divine Scriptures, containing the guidance of Allah for mankind, of which the Holy Qur'an is the final and the most perfect Book; belief in the existence of angels; belief in the Day of Resurrection and the Day of Judgement; Life after death; and belief in the Islamic doctrine that every human being is morally responsible of thier own actions - good or evil. Nothing can happen without the will and knowledge of Allah. Life in this world will come to an end one day when everything in this world will perish. Then Allah will bring all human beings back to life and judge - reward or punish - them according to their deeds they did during this temporary life on earth. These beliefs form the fundamentals of religion Islam. In the broader meanings Islam is the only religion preached by all the prophets and messengers: worship Allah alone and submit to Him alone. It is a religion as well as a complete way of life which requires submission to the Will of Allah and obedience to the laws of Allah alone as set down in the final of the revealed Books of Allah, the Holy Qur'an. Islam, in fact, is the direct relationship of a Muslim with God Almighty.
(1) Rights of Parents (and Duties of children)
Islam recognises family as a basic social unit. Along with the husband-wife relationship the Parent-child relationship is the most important one. To maintain any social relationship both parties must have some clear-cut Rights as well as obligations. The relationships are reciprocal. Duties of one side are the Rights of the other side. So in Parent-child relationship the Rights of parents are the obligations (duties) of the children and vice versa, the Rights of children are obligations (duties) of parents. Islam clearly defines the Rights of Parents (which mean duties of children) and obligations of parents (which means Rights of children).
It is clear that after Allah parents are the persons who give us innumerable favors. They provide protection, food and clothing to the newly born. The mother sacrifices her comforts and sleep to provide comfort to her children. The father works hard to provide for their physical, educational and psychological (and spiritual) needs. It is a matter of common courtesy that if a person does you some favor you feel obliged to him. Verbally you say ‘thank you’ to him. You try to repay and compensate him for his gifts and favors. You feel a sense of gratitude towards him. So it is with Allah and with parents. Allah’s favors cannot be counted or repaid except by thanking Him and obeying His orders. After Allah our parents deserve our thanks and obedience for the favors they had done us. That’s why Quran lays stress on feeling grateful to parents, and doing good to them. “And your Lord has ordained that you shall worship none save Him and shall do your parents a good turn.” What does a ‘good turn’ mean? It includes obeying them, speaking softly, avoiding harsh words or harsh tone, giving them company when they are lonely, caring for their physical and psychological needs (especially in their old age), and praying to Allah that He may bless them and have mercy on them.
As between parents the mother has more rights than the father. The reason is apparent. Mother has borne the child’s burden during pregnancy, has undergone birth pains in delivering the baby, has sacrificed her own comforts to provide comfort to her children, has looked after them and felt worried for their well-being. That is why mother deserves our good treatment more than the father. A Tradition of the Prophet (PBUH) tells us that a Companion asked the Prophet, “ Who deserves my good treatment most?” “Your mother”, said the Prophet. “Who next?” “Your mother”. “Who next?” “Your mother”. “Who after that?” “Your father”. This means that the mother deserves three times more good treatment from her children than the father deserves. Another Tradition wants us to extend kind treatment to close relations on the mother’s side also (even to her friends). A famous Hadith (Tradition) says, “Paradise lies under the feet of the mother”. This means doing good to our mother lead us to Paradise.
As to the reward for doing good to our parents a Hadith mentions the following story: “Three persons of ancient days were once traveling in a mountaneous region. The rain, thunder and lightning made them take refuge in a cave. Mudslide made a stone block the opening to the cave. The persons were entrapped inside. When the storm stopped they tried to push back the heavy stone to get out of the cave but they could not. They wondered ‘what to do now’. At last seeing that their joint efforts also cannot move the stone they decided to pray to Allah sincerely. One of them suggested, ‘each one of us should relate one good thing he has done in his life and beg Allah to move the stone. One said, “One night my old mother asked me to bring a cup of milk for her. During the time I milched the goat and brought it to her she had gone to sleep. I did not think it proper to disturb her. So I stood by her bedside for the whole night till she got up in the morning and then I offered her the cup of milk. O God, if this act of mine was approved by You please shift this stone.” The stone slipped a little but not enough to let them get out. Similarly, the second and the third man mentioned an act of goodness and prayed to God to shift the stone. The stone slipped down and the entry to the cave opened up. So the men got out. This story shows how service to one’s parents leads to blessings from God and rescue from troubles. Now let us summarize the Rights of Parents (Duties of children): (1) Right to be respected and obeyed:
Parents have a right to be respected and obeyed by children. All parents are well wishers of children. They issue orders and instructions that are in the best interest of children (though children might think otherwise). So it is the duty of children to obey their orders and act accordingly. Some children listen to parental orders but do not act upon these or show laziness in carrying out these orders. This causes annoyance to parents. Children should remember that annoying one’s parents can lead to God’s wrath. (2) Right to scold and rebuke:
It is instinctive obligation of parents to protect their children from physical and moral harm. If a small child puts its hand in fire it is natural urge for you to push the child back, even if the child does not want. It is in child’s interest. So it is with parents. They are duty bound to protect their children in every way, physical, intellectual, moral. If the children have a temptation to do an act that is not in their long-term interest it is the duty of the parents to keep them back from that act or behavior. To this end they may resort to advice, rebuke, scolding, even hitting them. Good children should take all this ‘harshness’ in their own interest. If parents scold them they should bear it calmly. No rude replies, no arguing, no explanations, no comments unless asked for. Parental advice should be listened to and acted upon, even if against children’s own wishes. (3) Right to be looked after.
Parents have looked after the children for decades. So it is the duty of grown-up children to repay them by way of caring for them and looking to their physical and financial needs. A Quranic verse says: “People ask you (O Prophet) how should they spend. Say, ‘whatever you spend should be spent on Allah (in good cause), on parents, near relatives, on orphans, destitutes and travelers (who fall short of money in foreign lands)”. (4) Right to be helped:
As parents grow old their energies also decline. So it is the duty of children to help their parents in any household chore in which they can help. Sons can help in lifting heavy things, cleaning home, arranging things etc. Daughters can help in mother’s household work—cooking, washing, cleaning, serving food etc. With good children such help should come automatically, not when asked for. Whenever you see your mother or father doing something extend a helping hand to her/him without their asking. This is what Islam expects from children. (5) Right to kind words/good behavior:
Qur'an urges children to be soft-spoken towards parents and show respect and kindness in their behavior towards parents.
Unfortunates it is, the Western societies have forgotten these lessons. Young children are rude towards parents and show disobedience. As the parents grow old they drive them out from their homes and put them in “Senior Citizens Homes”. Grown up children cannot spare time to attend to the needs of old parents. The busy Western life has led to a break-up of the family unit (so much upheld in Islam). As Muslims we expect our children to adhere to Islamic values and show respect, obedience, kindness, leniency and care towards parents, especially in their old age. Children must not forget the favors and sacrifices of their parents. As good mannered persons they must feel and remain obliged towards parents and try to repay them by kind words and deeds, even with money and material needs. These are the Rights of Parents due from their children (or the Duties of Children towards parents). These Rights and obligations are not found in Islam only. Such values are to be found in all true religions. Qur'an mentions Hazrat Yahya (John the Baptist) as “kind towards his parents, not tough and disobedient”. Similarly Hazrat Isa (Jesus) is quoted saying to his people, “God made me kind towards my mother (Mary) and did not make me tough and disobedient”. Hazrat Yousuf (Joseph), as a royal Minister in Egypt, called his old, poor parents from their far off home and offered them seats on a high platform (he did not feel shy of behaving in a kind manner to poor parents in the presence of his officials). (2) Rights of Children
